THE NEW GENERATION WHORING (SMW)

So who followed the #Dubai trend on twitter over the weekend? I know some people have no idea what I am talking about.

Well, I forgive you. That's why I am here anyways.

SMW means Social Media Whoring. This post reminds me of the 90s popular '2 girls and a cup' porn... yea I watched that one. Please don't tell my mum.

The next time you’re tempted to like a girl’s selfie on Facebook or write a slobbering comment about how good she looks on her Instagram page, just think of DUBAI PORTA POTTIES and smile.

Want to know what that means, then please pull a chair, grab your popcorn and read on.

 

Have you ever wondered how popular Instagram models can afford their lavish lifestyles? I do... thanks to my stalking abilities *covers face*. Selfies showing off expensive cars, bags, yet they all work low-paid jobs as human hair sellers or even makeup artists *yes makeup artists*. You probably figured a guy was paying for their Louis Vuitton purses and trips but you didn’t know the sheer depths these girls would sink to for a few bucks.

HOW JEALOUS DO YOU GET?

According to Webster Dictionary, Jealous is being defined as Vigilant in guarding a possession or disposed to suspect rivalry or unfaithfulness. 

For example, a friend of mine told me her boyfriend told her he gets jealous when people look at her (both guys and girls). He even went as far as saying when they get married, she'd start covering her face... ehn well I do not know what her response was but that's an amazing amount of jealousy. I know I live for the stares. I get satisfied when I know people are staring at me...hehehe

DEAR MOBY

Hellluuurrrr *in my strangest Madea's voice*

How y'all doing?

You know Moby is back when you get a Dear Moby series in a week *covers face*. Feels so good to be back. 

What's crackalacking?

MY MOOD RIGHT NOW? Mixed emotions.

I made a major life decision yesterday... nope I executed a major life changing decision yesterday. I should be happy about it but I made the decision months ago but I executed it 9 days earlier than I should have and I feel down tintin ni (small)... but I am happy I made the decision. I can see lots of people waiting to hear the gist... ntorrr. The decoders are trying to decode the gist... na lie. I am not telling anyborri... hehe.

HOW TO BE SINGLE

Hello Mobylizers

 

So today, I decided to blog whore a little and I checked out the boo's blog (Berry Dakara).... She has no idea how much I love her and this post caught my attention and I have decided to share with y'all. Please check out her blog. She is amazing and I just can't get enough of her gorgeousness.

THE GIRL STRUGGLE WAS REAL

It is hard too..hehe

Sup...sup..sup ma niggas. 

First, happy first mobylizing weekend. 

Everything we are doing here now is new o.. Feeling like I just came back from jand..hehe.

I met a Mobylizer yesterday at an event and you all needed to have seen her face when she saw me. She said "Moby mentioned me on the blog o" and she was so happy that I was back to blogging. I was feeling so inspired ehn. I decided to put up a post today because of Deola and I hope when next she sees me, she gives me an iphone 6 cos I have mentioned her on the blog twice in one week *covers face*.

 Kisses huni.

So what do I have for us today?

I HAVE A STINKY HOO-HA

You know Moby is back to Blogsville when you start seeing things like this. Hahahaha...

I can imagine some people's faces like "ehn mgbo Moby has a smelly down-below". 

Let me digress a bit. 

I was talking to a friend of mine sometime and I asked her what other nick names she calls her Vagina (using medical terms here before Pastor will call me out during worker's meeting) and she said SOUTH PARK. 

THIS ISN'T GOODBYE 2

*CLEARS THROAT*

*peeps in*

*one leg in*

Oh nooo... my heart is beating faster than normal. Why am I scared to blog? This is my baby and I am scared to cuddle her.. noooooo. 

DON JAZZY AND OLAMIDE BROKE US UP

What the f*&K did I just read?

Good day Mr.Chairman sir, panel of judges, accurate time keeper and my fellow audience.

Before I continue, I will like to give honor to whom honor is due..before some people will call me out and say I am trying too hard to blog like Stella. *hol up...hol up* I love Stella Dimokokorkus and I love her style of blogging but is it enough to get insulted over.. eyin eyan buru sha(humans are wicked sha).

Anyways, I was going through Stella's chronicle post and I saw this hilarious one. It is friggin' funny to me I swear and I am sure you all will say the same thing. Like TF...

Don't let me spol it for y'all...please read.

THE GOOD, THE BAD, THE UGLY

I try small sha..

Hello my dearest Mobylizers

I wish I was anonymous and no one knew I was Moby... the kind of things you'd read on here would scare the crap out of you. Still scares me when I think about it sometimes sha...

I'm sure by now, we have jotted down a list of our resolutions.. I did. The first was "I WILL NOT DRINK COCA COLA IN 2016". I have had 3 bottles already *covers face*. So what's the assurance I would be able to keep to the others *sad face*.
 Anyway, I know 2016 is going to be AMAZE-BALLS. I can feel it and I pray this year would favor us all in Jesus name...Amen.

HAPPY NEW YEAR MOBYLIZERS

No be design am o... I saw this beautiful banner and edited it..Before someone would send me petition